ED FAIR

The first night I saw her drift slowly into the Blue Dawn Bar

The air reeked of cheap whiskey and a backroom Cuban cigar

She floated like a ballerina across the rough and beer-stained floor

All eyes on her as the chatter dropped to a mumble from a roar

 

The spinning lights behind the bar flickered in her deep oval eyes

Like blinding fireballs shooting across the bleak downtown skies

The music blared like cannons but I couldn’t hear a note or a sound

As she stepped a little closer I felt like I might sink and drown

 

Something about her innocence pulled me to her hard and fast

Countered by a flashing frown that hinted at a tragic and angry past

She wasn’t looking for much more than a cold beer and a smile

Hiding behind her masquerade was a scared and lonely child

 

We spun out of control quicker than a spark ignites a flame

Weeks rolled into weeks but everything still looked and felt the same

I feared one day I might fall back into the dark corner from where I came

But she hit me again with those long lost looks that kept me in the game

 

Then something snapped in her like a twig in the crisp and hapless wind

I turned around to stop it but it was too late to try to defend

The green-eyed cowboy had become her new-found addiction

And our short story quickly faded into an abandoned work of fiction

 

I did what I could to pull her back from the brink

The harder I tried to do it the deeper she would sink

I felt like I got hit with a bullet that went clean through

I should have seen it coming but she never left a hint or a clue

 

The years crawled by like images on a tattered movie screen

I never thought about her much except in a faint and drunken dream

I carried around my own heavy life like a yoke around my neck

The drinks and drugs helped a bit to keep my heart in check

 

I nursed a watered-down bourbon trying to keep the demons at bay

Listening to the bartender’s voice choke and grind away

I squinted as the sun poured through the cracked and broken blind

And I sang another sad goodbye to the day I left behind

 

I heard the door creak and the ragged laugh that I barely could remember

She wore the same eyes but her fire had cooled down to an ember

I wondered if I could turn my head and maybe just disappear

Slither out the backdoor and hide until the coast was clear

 

She saw me from across the room and made a beeline for the empty chair

For a half second that seemed like forever I couldn’t help but stare

I guess she didn’t realize that life had left her standing in its dust

No silver lining in her pocket and her gold had turned to rust

 

She looked a little worn and her color had all but drained

Maybe so many packs of Camels had finally laid their claim

She had lost that quick draw grin with its crooked easy smile

Like she swam across a hundred rivers and walked a thousand miles

 

As the smoke curled up in a shapeless ghost from the corner of her lip

I pushed the chair back from the table with a haunting screeching sound

I knew my next move long before my feet ever hit the ground

I had to make it fast before I staggered and lost my grip

 

But as I walked across the blacktop through the torrents of freezing rain

And my breath turned to steam like smoke from an outbound Texas train

Something pulled me back to the corner table in the Blue Dawn Bar

A broken memory and the crackling sound of an out of tune guitar

 

I didn’t have it in me to leave her like a stray cat on some deserted street

I didn’t have it in me to let her throw down her cards and crumble in defeat

She hadn’t moved an inch as if she had frozen in an ice cold trance

I took her trembling hand to pull her to her feet and whispered “last chance”